funnies

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, and the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese."-Chris Rock

"Football combines the two worst features of American life: violence and committe meetings."-George Will

"I just recently had my Visa card stolen. Now it's everywhere I want to be."-Scott Wood

"We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typrewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true."-Robert Wilensky

"The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass."-Martin Mull

"I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair."-Thom Sharp

"Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry."-Rita Rudner